The Little Prince
by marylwhit
Summary: JJ finds a little boy named Spencer at the scene of his mother's suicide, and eventually adopts him. AU. Full summary inside - please read for warnings.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi there! This started as a prompt for a drabble, and grew exponentially as a result of me avoiding my film essay. **

**Summary says it all. Will feature Henry who is seven months older than Spencer, and Morgan and Garcia. Later chapters will be Spencer's perspective, and I warn you - bring tissues. Rated T for mentions of sexual abuse and bullying in later chapters.**

* * *

"She's been dead at least a week." Morgan said from the other side of the room. He was solemn, but there was nothing to suggest this case was anything but ordinary. "There's no sign of foul play here, Jayje. I doubt it's connected."

Morgan held up a bottle of prescription meds. "Oxycodone." He read. "I'm thinking most likely an overdose."

JJ's listened, but her eyes were fixed on the crib. Something about it looked wrong and out of place. The whole room was a mess. There were moldy half eaten sandwiches on the floor, soiled clothing in piles, and various stains and spills over the carpet and bedsheets, but the cradle was empty, save for a neatly folded blanket and little pillow. Poking out from under the bed was a messy, half-eaten sandwich on a plate, and it definitely was not a week old.

Next to the plate were some books in a stack - Vanity Fair, Oliver Twist, a book of poems by Chaucer, and puzzlingly, a box-set of 'Where's Spot?" picture books. JJ bent down to move them out of the way, and investigate further when something else caught her eye. There was a peice of string next to the books, and when she pulled on it, a wooden toy train appeared. It was painted red, blue and yellow with a notch on the front where the string was attached JJ went to grab it, but before she could, a little hand got there first. She jumped back and instinctively reached for her gun.

"My train." She heard a little voice say, whoever it belonged to sounded very young. Another hand appeared, and the mysterious child pulled the train back under the crib.

JJ felt Morgan kneel down beside her. Neither one wanted to scare the child, but they needed to get him or her out of the house and away from their dead mother's body. No doubt he or she had already seen it.

JJ leaned down and looked under the crib. The first thing she saw were a big pair of brown eyes and a mop of overgrown hair. The child was holding on to it's train with one hand and sucking it's thumb with the other. JJ noticed how sunken it's eyes were, and how skinny it's little body was too.

"Hey there," JJ said. "What's your name?"

"'Pence." The child replied with no hesitation, still clinging to his train. "Mommy dead."

JJ reached under the cradle and beckoned the child towards her. He - she assumed he was a boy - automatically went to her, and she lifted him into her arms. He was wearing jeans with a mickey mouse belt, and a single green sock. He looked around the same age as Henry, perhaps a little younger, but it was hard to tell when he looked so ill. He was filthy, he needed a diaper change and a warm blanket, and no doubt something to eat and drink too.

Morgan shrugged of his jacket and put it around the boy, and Spencer stared at him with worry and took hold of JJ's shirt.

She wasted no time getting him to the ambulance downstairs.

* * *

Inside the ambulance, the EMT shone a torch in Spencer's eyes while the little boy turned a cracker in his hand. They asked him questions about his mom, and where his dad was. They asked him if he wanted more food, and if he felt okay, but all the boy did was stare up at JJ and hold on to her hand.

"Spencer, does daddy live with you and mommy?" The EMT asked for the third time, he was getting annoyed. Spencer sensed that, and this time he his face in JJ's coat and cried.

"He's upset." JJ explained. Spencer was only little and it was all too much for him. She lifted him up and rocked him a bit. "Look, he's not injured and he's not ready to answer your questions, so I'm going to take him inside and find him some clothes. He's frozen."

She didn't wait for a reply, and promptly stepped out the van and went straight back into the house.

"I know you probably don't want to be back in here." She told the boy when his grip tightened around her neck. "We'll just get you changed and then we'll go back outside, okay?"

She could have asked someone to fetch some clothes for Spencer, but she wanted to give him a quick bath too. She didn't want to draw attention to the fact she was sneaking back in to the house, and didn't want to hear,_ "JJ, this is an active crime scene, you can take him back to the station_" but she knew the warm water would relax him a little bit, and she thought it was best he just go to sleep. The last thing he needed was to overhear a load of scary strangers talking about how his mother had died.

The bathroom was fairly typical. Kind of small. No shower. And while brightly colored curtain hung over the bath, there were no toys or any sign that a toddler lived here too. JJ leant over the bath and started the water. There was no changing table, so she laid Spencer on the bathroom rug and undid his belt, pulling off his jeans. She could already tell this was going to hurt him, he hadn't been changed in a week and his skin was raw and peeling. When she undid his diaper and started to clean him, his face contorted and he started to scream.

"I know, sweetie." JJ whispered, trying to distract him with the only thing she could see - a bottle of shampoo - and failing. "I know it hurts. I'm sorry."

JJ couldn't put the boy through the pain of having a bath, so she opened the side cabinet under the sink to find his diapers. Fortunately, a pack of diapers and a bottle of talcum powder were the only things sitting on the shelf. There wasn't any cream for diaper rash, but Spencer could make do until they left the house. She looked back to Spencer, and that's when she noticed his skin wasn't just peeling, it was scarred. There were marks around his genitals, and down the inside of his thighs. She turned him over on to his stomach, and saw their were scars on his bottom, too.

"Who did this to you?" She asked out loud.

Spencer fidgeted on the floor and kicked his little legs, so she quickly finished changing him, and pulled some clothes out of the laundry hamper to dress him in.

* * *

It was soon revealed that Spencer Reid's mother, Diana, had been a paranoid schizophrenic and although she had regularly forgot to take her medication, she was addicted to oxycodone and took anything she could get her hands on. She had been dead for a six days before they found her body, and during that time her resourceful yet neglected two and a half year old had managed to keep himself alive. They doubted he would have been able to for much longer, however, as he'd already cleared out the fridge, and the chair he'd pulled up against the cabinets was too small for him to have been able to reach the higher shelves.

Spencer's father, William, hadn't been able to cope with his wives failing mind or his precocious toddler, and had walked out on them both just over a month before Diana's death. He very narrowly avoided being charged with child abuse, and once the debacle was over, he was all to happy to relinquish all parental rights and put the child up for adoption. Hotch slammed photographs of Spencer's scars down on the table in front of him and demanded to know what had happened. William played ignorant, and because they had no evidence to suggest it had been he who had inflicted them, and not Diana, he was free to go. Not once did he ask how the boy was, or what would happen to him.

With no other family, Spencer was placed into the foster care system. During that time, JJ couldn't stop thinking about him. When she had taken him back outside after dressing him, a lady from Social Services was there to take him away. He was still howling in pain, and the lady pulled him from JJ, not even trying to soothe him. JJ waved goodbye to Spencer as the lady carried him down the driveway, and watched his little hand reach out to her over the women's shoulder. JJ couldn't help but think that some part of him already knew he'd struck out in life. JJ had a son of her own, Henry, who was seven months older than Spencer. If something happened to her, she'd want Henry to go to someone who would love him. She wouldn't want him to spend his childhood being passed around to people who saw him as nothing more than a meal ticket. She wondered what Diana would have wanted for Spencer.

Every time JJ looked over to the photo of Henry sitting on her desk, she thought of Spencer. One Thursday afternoon, while the rest of her team sat in the bullpen filling out paper work, she called Las Vegas Police Department from her office. At first they didn't know who she was asking about, but after some prompting the women on the phone gave her the number for the children's home Spencer was staying at. Maria at the children's home informed JJ that Spencer hadn't been well treated at his first or second foster home, and as a result had ended up in their group home facility. Maria was certain it would be an extended stay, as traumatized nearly-three year olds weren't exactly sought after for adoption. She told JJ that Spencer spent most days under his bed, flat on his stomach and in complete silence, and only ever came out when someone removed him by force. She said he didn't get along with other children, and if the staff made him go into the playroom, he would sit in the corner with his face to the wall.

"He's scared." JJ reasoned, wondering if the homes budget allowed for Spencer to have some kind of therapy. "He just lost his mom, I'm sure in time he'll-"

"He's disturbed!" The women interrupted and then she laughed. Actually laughed.

And that's when JJ said she'd take him. It came out before she could stop it. She told the lady she could email the paper work through and do all the necessarily checks, but as far as she was concerned that boy was already hers and they better treat him right until she could pick him up.

* * *

The day JJ went to pick Spencer up, Auntie Garcia in toe with a giant stuffed dolphin under her arm, and an equally giant grin on her face, she was starting to have doubts. Up until this point, she had only thought about Spencer - how badly he needed a new home, how terribly he was being treated in the foster care system - she hadn't even thought to consider how his presence would disrupt Henry's life, as well as her own.

"I'm already a single mom, Pen." She said. "What in the world possessed me to think I could take on another child?"

"Because your a good person," Garcia replied, reassuring her friend as they walked up the long driveway to the children's home - the worst possible time to question the decision. "And you know he needs a home, and mom and a whole bunch of people that will love him."

JJ forced a smile.

"What if I can't look after him?" JJ sighed. She stopped mid-way down the driveway and ran a hand through her hair. If she walked away now, before she signed the papers and made Spencer her son, it wouldn't be as bad as giving up later. "The caseworkers told me he's not well. He doesn't speak to anyone, he won't play with the other kids, and at night he stands in the corner of the bedroom and slams his head into the wall. He doesn't cry for his mom or ask where he dad went, and he won't talk about them either. Pen, he's been abused, and he watched his mother's dead body decompose for a week before we got to him. He's traumatized and I don't know if I can take that all on."

"Well." Garcia started quietly. JJ had watched her peppiness and excitement die down as she had spoken about Spencer, now the women looked angry. JJ hadn't seen her like this before. "Walk way now. Before he thinks someone cares about him, then you decide you can't handle it and he loosed another mom. I thought the reason you were adopting him is because you could give him the help he needs, better than he'll get at this place at least!"

Garcia calmed down a bit, her voice was quiet. "We'll help you, Jayje. Whatever you guys needs."

JJ nodded. Now she felt like crap. She wasn't going to reject a traumatized little boy. She didn't want to reject him.

Garcia wrapped her free arm around JJ's shoulder and they both continued towards the house. "Come on. He's probably waiting for you."

* * *

Spencer _was_ waiting for JJ. Actually sitting on the porch with his toy train in his hands, and staring down the long driveway. When JJ and Garcia approached him slowly, he offered Garcia his toy train. She took it, smiling from ear to ear. Then the boy turned to JJ and held his arms up to her. She picked him up, and that was it. JJ had two boys now.

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_Please leave a review if you want me to continue :)_


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi again! Thank you to those who reviewed :)**

**In this chapter JJ brings Spencer home, and Henry and Spencer get to know each other.**

* * *

When JJ first told Henry he was getting a new brother, the boy was overjoyed at the prospect of having a new playmate. When he heard his mom's car pull up at the house on the big day, he grabbed his Uncle Derek and pulled him over to the window.

"He's coming!" Henry squealed in excitement, and waved at his Auntie Penelope. His mom was in the backseat, and he couldn't see her very well. He watched Uncle Derek open the door and wave, too, and after a while Mommy got out the car and came inside. She was carrying the new brother.

"Mom!" Henry yelled, "I drawed for you!" He pointed back at the dining room table, and expected his mom to be really interested, but all she did was pat him on the head and hold her finger to her lips.

"Spencer." JJ said softly to the bundle in her arms. "It's okay, this is your new home. You'll be happy here." She stood for a moment and shared worried glances with her friends before it became obvious the boy wasn't going to calm down or ease his grip on her blouse anytime soon. She told Garcia he needed to rest for a while, and took him through to her bedroom, closing the door behind her.

That's when Henry's enthusiasm died down a bit.

"Uncle Derek?" He asked, "What's wrong with him?"

"He's just a little sad, Henry." Morgan explained. "He doesn't know your mom yet."

Morgan and Garcia got Henry to help them make chicken and rice for dinner. Henry laughed when Morgan picked up the raw chicken and made it dance across the kitchen bench. Once they had put it in the oven, they watched cartoons and then Henry continued his drawing at the table. He had drawn his mom and his dad, and was coloring in the grass with a green marker when his mother sat down beside him and kissed his head.

"How is he?" Garcia asked from the sofa.

"He's asleep now." JJ said, quite obviously exhausted. "He hasn't been sick again, but he's still upset."

They had dinner late that night, JJ went back to her room to get Spencer while the others set the table and Morgan started to cut into the slightly over-cooked chicken.

In JJ's bedroom, Spencer was still asleep on his back. His hands were wrapped around the toy train that provided him some level of familiarity and comfort. JJ gently woke him up and he stared at her confused for a little while, before he realized where he was, abandoning the train and crawling into his new mother's arms.

When they were all finally seated and ready to tuck in, Henry, annoyed that Spencer had taken the best seat in the house - on _his _mother's lap - decided to throw a tantrum.

"I'm not hungry mommy!" He yelled, pushing his chicken across the plate with his fork.

"Henry, you need to eat." JJ reasoned.

The boy pushed his chicken off the edge of the plate and looked up at his mother daringly.

"He's not eating!" He said, pointing at Spencer.

Spencer was sitting with his chest pressed up against his mothers and his hands stuck to her blouse. JJ had a spoon loaded with rice in one hand, and was trying to peel Spencer away from her with the other, so she could put it in his mouth. On the plane ride home, she had fed him a sandwich and a cup of juice, but it had all come straight back up.

She knew he wasn't sick. Despite the fact he had originally been very keen for JJ to take him home, if only to get out of that horrible children's home, he was now very nervous. It was completely understandable, especially considering how badly he had been treated by the other adults who had promised him a loving new home.

"Spencer is trying to eat, Henry," JJ explained, "He's not feeling well."

Spencer looked up at JJ with sad eyes, and opened his mouth weakly.

He didn't want them talking about him, and he didn't want to be a _bad _boy either.

"Good boy, Spencer." She told him.

After dinner Morgan took Henry outside to kick around a soccer ball and Garcia stayed inside with JJ and Spencer. She went over to the book cabinet and picked out some books she knew Henry loved, and she assumed Spencer would like too. The little boy was still stuck to JJ, and both women looked at each other worriedly. Since she had collected him, JJ had told Spencer he was safe, that she loved him, and she was going to look after him. She told him over and over, but it had no effect. JJ knew a jumble of confusing words from a stranger meant very little to a three-year old.

JJ felt Spencer all but jump out of his skin when Garcia called from the other side of the room.

"_Oh, The Very Hungry Caterpillar! Have you read this one, Spencer_?"

When he calmed, the little boy looked up at his aunt, and didn't stay anything for a long time. After Garcia had sat down next to him and opened the book, just about to start reading, he placed his hand over the image of the caterpillar.

"Mommy read this to me." He said very quietly.

JJ and Garcia watched as the boy took the book and flicked through it. He stuck his finger through the hole in one of the strawberries and giggled.

"Ca-pat-illa eat the staw-bees!" He cried, as if it was the funniest thing he'd ever seen.

"Would you like Auntie Pen to read you the book, Spencer?" JJ asked as Spencer continued to tear through the pages.

He shook his head absently and turned to the front of the book, placing his pointer finger under the line of words.

"I do it!" He said. Then, slowly and carefully, he began to read, "In the light of the moon a little egg lay on a leaf..."

"Oh my god, JJ!" Garcia exclaimed, "He can read already!"

JJ could help but laugh.

"Garcia," She said, "Kids can memorize books if their parents read them often enough."

"Oh, " Said Garcia, "Well I'm still impressed."

JJ was _more _than impressed when Spencer finished The Very Hungry Caterpillar, and moved on to Henry's book of nursery rhymes which he said he'd never seen before.

When questioned about his ability , Spencer simply replied,"Mommy teached me."

It was nine o'clock before Garcia and Morgan left that night. Henry was asleep on the sofa underneath the coat Morgan had left behind, and Spencer was still wide awake and reading the books in the cabinet.

JJ lifted Henry and carried him through to his bedroom. She was just tucking him in when she felt something grab on to her pant leg.

"Spencer," JJ said in a whisper, looking down at the wide-eyed boy. "I'm just putting Henry to bed. I'm not leaving you."

Spencer nodded and let JJ pick him up. He felt JJ rocking him and rested his head against her shoulder, looking around Henry's room. There were toy trains and cars and dinosaurs, and the walls were blue with a safari themed border. Henry had his own desk and a bookshelf that was nearly full.

"You can read some of the books in here too." JJ told him. "Henry has some good ones."

JJ took Spencer through to the bathroom and started the water. The little boy leant over the side of the tub and reached out to touch the rapidly rising water while JJ tried to keep him still so she could take his clothes off. She noticed he was wearing two odd socks, one in plain blue and the other in yellow with a green trim.

"Look at your socks, Spencer." She said with a smile. "We have to find you two the same."

"No, I like them." Spencer said simply, pointing to his feet. "Mommy got a blue and a pink."

Diana had been wearing a blue sock and a pink sock when she was found. If Spencer was able to recall that information, JJ knew he must have been around her body for a long time. She imagined Spencer climbing up on to his mother's bed and shaking her, calling her name and desperately trying to wake her up. She figured Diana hadn't been able to match two socks - let alone look after her child - and Spencer had modeled his own dress sense after hers.

Spencer pulled off the socks and began to climb into the tub. JJ lifted him up and set him down into the water, taking the plastic boat off the side watching him splash around with it while she started washing his face. He was quite content until she started to wash his body. The moment the cloth touched his stomach he dropped the toy and wriggled away from her, cowering in on himself and holding his hands up by his chest.

"Don't." He looked up at her with sad eyes and then down at himself. "Don't touch. Please."

JJ immediately took her hands away and tried to reassure him with a smile.

"Spencer," She said. "I'm not going to hurt you, I promise. I'm just helping you get clean."

She knew Spencer had been abused by the people who should have been taking care of him, and she knew this behavior should be expected. She could only hope he would grow to trust her.

Spencer looked around the room anxiously, but he nodded. He took the washcloth from her and in a very uncoordinated and stiff manner, starting to rub at his face.

"I can do it." He said, "You come back later."

"I can't leave you, honey." JJ said, more to herself that to Spencer. "You're only little."

Spencer pushed the boat away and reached for the shampoo, determined to show JJ he was big. JJ watched as he pulled the bottle open with his teeth and accidentally emptied half of it into the water trying to put some on his hand. He allowed her to help him with the shampoo after that, but he wanted to wash his hair and body by himself, so she let him. He was capable, perhaps to capable for someone who wasn't even three yet.

* * *

The first night passed without event, as did the second and the third. Spencer was a little clingy, and very, very quiet but he seemed to be adapting well to the situation.

Henry, however, was not.

He didn't like Spencer touching his toy cars, or wearing his clothes of hogging his Auntie Pen. It wasn't fair that Spencer always got the last bedtime story, and Mommy stayed in his room for longer, or that Spencer had a green sippy cup and his was only blue. He didn't want to share his mom, or his house or his things, _especially _with a boy who didn't even want to play with him.

On the fourth day, Henry awoke to find Spencer sitting on the floor of the living room, reading _his special book_ from the shelf in his room. Without hesitation Henry went over to his brother and latched on to the book, pulling as hard as he could, but Spencer wouldn't let go.

"Mine!" He shrieked. "Mine, _'Pence_!"

Spencer held on tightly and screamed just as loudly. Henry pulled until the pages ripped, and his grip slipped and he fell back on to his bottom. He kicked his legs and threw his limbs around, the beginnings of a tantrum.

Spencer looked down at what he had considered to have been _his_ book too, and started to cry.

"No!" He cried, "'Pence book!"

Henry got to his feet, lunging at Spencer and weakly pulling his hair. Spencer cried for his mom, and that made Henry even more upset. He grabbed the front of Spencer's onesie and pulled him across the floor very slowly. Spencer looked up at him, too confused to really do anything.

"Go home!" Henry said. "You go out!"

Spencer got up and walked to the front door. Henry had gone in to the kitchen and was in the process of noisily pushing a wooden chair over to the door so he could open it. Once it was in the right place, he climbed on it and fiddled with the handle. Enough was enough, Spencer was going to leave now. Putting him outside would do the trick. That's when he felt someone lift him up, and set him down on the carpet.

"Henry!" JJ said, "What are you doing?"

"'Pence going now." Henry explained, and he pointed to the door, "Open please!"

JJ sighed. Spencer was against the wall with his thumb in his mouth, and there was a ripped book on the floor at the center of the room. Spencer pointed to it with his free hand.

"Henry, Spencer lives here now." She said. "He's your brother."

"Where's 'Pence mommy?" Henry asked, "You're my mommy not his."

JJ looked to Spencer. He hadn't asked about his Mom, not even once. She knew it was going to take a little while for Spencer to realize he would never see her again, and she understood he wasn't ready to talk about her or anything else for that matter. She ignored Henry's questioning.

"Henry," JJ said. "Spencer's little, and he needs a big boy like you to look after him. I think he would really like to see your dinosaurs, maybe you could show him?"

Henry eyed Spencer.

"Okay." He said. "But I'm bigger so I get to pick a dinosaur first."

JJ watched Henry put his arm around Spencer and disappear down the hall.

* * *

**Next chapter: Spencer asks about his Mom and Dad**

**Reviews motivate me to write!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi all, thanks to all those who reviewed :) Major drama this week with the story, my computer blue-screened while I was writing, and when I opened the document back up it was blank! I tried everything to get it back, but in the end I had to re-write it all which was a pain. I don't know if I'm 100% happy with how it turned out but here's chapter 3.**

* * *

After two weeks, Spencer wasn't sure how he felt about his new family. Henry was a little bossy, and only shared his toys if Spencer would play in the way he wanted him to. When he got annoyed, he liked to remind Spencer he was the big brother, and therefore Spencer had to listen. When Auntie Pen called, everyday at 3.p.m like clockwork, Henry made Spencer stand guard at the kitchen door while he raided the cookie jar. But Henry always shared the cookies. They would run upstairs and hide in the closet, giggling and munching on cookies while their mother sat with the phone on the sofa, seemingly oblivious.

JJ was kind and he liked her a lot, but sometimes when she would kiss him goodnight, Spencer would cry. She made him feel safe and happy, but at the same time there was a dull ache in his chest that just wouldn't go away.

JJ worried about Spencer. He didn't like to talk to anyone unless it was absolutely necessary and he spent most of his time laying on the floor with his head propped up in one hand while the other turned the pages of books he shouldn't be reading. JJ would ask if he wanted to go to the park, he told her 'no'. She took his hand and led his outside to kick the soccer ball around, he asked if he could go back inside. Despite his selective mutism, Spencer would ask JJ to save an extra cookie for his mom, or happily tell her that when he got home he was going to make his mom a peanut butter sandwich for dinner. JJ watched him draw squiggly pictures of himself and his mother, standing outside their house with a round yellow blob shining down on them, and he would say that when his mother was feeling better, they would go for a walk in the sunshine.

JJ didn't know how to explain 'death' to a three year old, and she didn't just want to blurt out that his mother wasn't coming back over dinner. Hotch told her it was important for Spencer to know death wasn't a choice, and his mother hadn't chosen to abandon him like his dad had. Hotch had told Jack about angels and the afterlife, but Spencer was too young and JJ knew he would only be confused by all that.

So JJ decided she needed to get the boy out of the house and into a new routine. One Friday afternoon, she called the head-teacher at Henry's preschool to enroll Spencer for the next cycle. She didn't know how the boy would like being thrown in with a bunch of kids he didn't know -_ and she sincerely doubted he'd ever had any contact with other children under his biological mother's care before_ - but she assumed he'd warm up soon enough.

* * *

The following Monday, Spencer followed JJ through the entrance hall, his hand intertwined with hers. He'd heard of 'school' and of 'preschool', his mother had told him when he was old enough, she would take him there. That day had never come, but he was always left wondering just what the places were like

When they reached the desk, JJ let go of Spencer's hand and walked over to the door. He could see through to a room full of children. He'd never seen so many toys, or bright colors in his life. The walls were orange, the chairs were blue, the tables were red. There was noise and music and laughter and smiling. He could see Henry in the distance, outside, in a sandpit. He was building a giant sandcastle with the help of another little boy with red hair and glasses. Next to them, a boy was riding a big wheel with a plastic spade in one hand, and a girl was pushing a basketball around in a stroller. Yet, Spencer was more interested in the little girl with short brown hair sitting on a beanbag next to a bookshelf in the corner of the room, just reading. He wanted to know what the book was about, and if they could read it together. He looked up at his mother and pointed towards the girl.

"Do you want to go and play, Spencer?" JJ asked.

Spencer looked around again.

"You stay?" He asked worridly. If JJ left him, maybe she wouldn't come back again. Dad left too, and he didn't come back.

JJ didn't answer, the head-teacher had appeared at the desk.

"Hi Sonia," JJ greeted, "We spoke on the phone? This is Spencer."

The women leaned over the desk and smiled at Spencer. She was a plump women with dark skin and very bright clothing. Spencer stared back at her, and while her smile was warm, he stepped behind JJ.

"He's a little nervous."

"No wonder, poor boy. I'll fetch the enrollment forms, you can take him in to look around if you want." Sonia disappeared into the office.

"JJ stay?" Spencer asked again, and JJ nodded earnestly.

"Of course I will, should we go and play now?"

Spencer smiled and JJ led him over the Play-Doh table and sat him on her lap. He wanted to go and meet the little girl, but JJ didn't seem to understand. He pointed, but all she said was, "You can read at home, Spencer. There's lots of other fun things to do at preschool."

Spencer gave up and watched his mother play with the green gunge. He held on to the sides of her legs and was very reluctant to touch it himself.

"Nuh-uh. Dirty stuffs." He told his mother, JJ had to stop herself from laughing.

"It's not dirty sweetheart, it's a toy."

Well it wasn't like any toy Spencer had ever seen. It reminded him of the stuff that came out of mommy's mouth when she 'died'. Spencer wondered when she was going to stop being 'died' and he was going to go back home.

Cautiously, he stuck his finger into the middle of a lump of it and looked at the other kids. He swore one girl was taking sneaky bites of the so called 'toy'.

"What I do this?" He asked.

"You make it into something."

"What?"

JJ sculpted a little person out of the dough and gave it to Spencer.

"Look, it's a little you."

Spencer grinned and took the Play-Doh, squishing it in his hands and breaking it into pieces. He took up a few of the bits and put them back together, placing them in JJ's hand. He reached across the table and got a plastic fork, pressing it into the remaining dough.

"I made a JJ." He said, grinning widely. JJ told him how wonderful his flattened dough was.

"If you'd like to sign the forms, we can enroll Spencer in for next intake."

JJ looked around to see Sonia behind her with a manila folder. She went over to the desks while Spencer played happily.

"How old is he?" Sonia asked.

"He's almost three, just a little younger than Henry."

Sonia clicked her tongue and watched Spencer. "Poor thing." She said. "You're a good woman to take him, Jennifer."

JJ continued to fill out the forms and shook her head. "He's a _good boy_, just very quiet. He's confused, he doesn't know what's going on."

"Has he asked about his birth mother yet?"

"Not yet, to be honest I'm dreading it. How do you explain death to someone so young?"

Sonia held her hand up and quickly went over to the bookshelf, smiling down at the little girl who was still sitting there. When she returned, she had a thin picture book in her hand, and she gave it to JJ.

"This will help, you should keep it."

JJ looked down at the book, it had a picture of a hand drawn little boy on the front looking very sad, and the words 'I Miss You'.

* * *

It took a little less than a month for that fact his mother wasn't coming back to really hit Spencer.

The ache in his chest was getting so intense he could barely breathe, and it was scary. He couldn't understand the words 'never' or 'ever', and the concept of 'dead' was far to difficult for him to grasp. He knew what it meant, but he couldn't understand _what_ happened or _why_ it happened. And so, in the middle of the night, propelled from his bed by the desperate need for his mother to hold him close and take away the pain, confusion and fear, he stumbled into JJ's room and climbed on to her bed.

"JJ!" He cried. "Wake up!"

"Spencer? Baby, what is it?" JJ sat up and flicked on the bedside light. She was met with a little boy who was clearly in distress, pulling on the bed-sheets and crying.

"Mom," He sobbed, "Where's mom?"

She silently picked him up and settled him against her chest. He pulled at her clothes and kicked his legs, screaming for his mother and not understanding why JJ wasn't doing anything to help.

_"When mom coming?"_

_"When I going home?"_

"You live here now, Spencer." JJ said softly. "This is your new home and we all love you."  
"I want my mommy, want go home!"

JJ stroked Spencer's hair, and did all she could to calm him until he couldn't scream anymore.

"I know you miss mommy," She said, "But she went to sleep and she won't wake up again."

_"Why? Where she go?"_

JJ wondered if she should have taken him to his mother's funeral. If that would have offered some sense of closure for him. She leaned over and opened the night stand where the book Sonia gave her lay on top of an unpaid phone bill and bank statement. She opened on the first page and started reading. At first, Spencer wasn't interested, too busy pulling his mother's hair out, but eventually JJ's calm voice won him over and he lay against her with tears on his eyelashes and a thumb in his mouth, listening intently.

JJ read about the little boy who lost his mom, and Spencer asked lots of questions about how people die and why they die. When JJ was finished, she reached into the drawer and brought out a framed picture of Spencer's mother. They had found it in the house, and Hotch had told her that Jack liked to talk to a picture of his mother, and Spencer might like to as well.  
Spencer reached out his finger and stroked his mother's face lovingly.

"Can you give mommy a kiss?" JJ asked softly, and Spencer looked down at the photo, pressing his face to it and then hugging it close. She wanted to tell him she was going to be his new mother, and she wanted to hear him call _her_ 'mommy' but it didn't seem like the right time to throw all that on him too, so she wordlessly settled him down next to her and pulled the blanket up around him, watching closely until he fell asleep.

* * *

**Please review :)**


	4. Chapter 4

_Hi there, sorry for the wait! I've had so much work and no time to relax, I can't wait to graduate!_

* * *

While Spencer understood his mother wasn't coming back, he took longer to accept it as fact. One night, after refusing to sleep, he stood in the hall and stamped his feet and very sensibly declared that it wasn't fair his 'first Mommy' was dead, and he was feeling 'velly swessed out'. JJ agreed with him, but all she could do was take him to her room and read to him until he was exhausted enough to fall sleep in her bed.

On another occasion, frustrated at not being able to adequately communicate what he was feeling, and angry that he felt so horrible in the first place, Spencer took everything out on his precious wooden train, throwing it down the stairs of the front porch.

"Spence, mommy will fix it." JJ offered. She knew how important his train was to him. His one familiar object amongst all the confusion. His only reminder of his birth mother, and his life before the Jareaus.

"No!" Spencer screamed. "It's dead! Dead like mom!"

JJ watched Spencer struggle to cope with everything, and it hurt. No one should have to go through what he had, especially not at three. But nothing hurt as much as the question Spencer would ask every night right before he fell asleep,

"Will you come back tomorrow?"

And JJ would nod, stroke his hair and pinky swear that she would still be with him - _still be alive_ - when he woke up.

After a two months, and just before his third birthday, Spencer suddenly started calling JJ "Mommy". As she dished up mac and cheese on to two Spiderman plates, Spencer said, "Can I have some juice, Mommy?" JJ assumed it was a small slip from a very tired boy, but the next morning when she got a hug with "Good morning, Mommy!" and was pulled into the living room to see something funny on Spongebob with "Mommy he lives in a fruit! Inside a fruit!" she knew Spencer felt comfortable using the word, and with being part of their little family.

No matter how thrilled JJ was that Spencer was adjusting, Henry was less than impressed. Mom had one boy, and his name is Henry. Henry was meant to be the one sleeping in Mom's bed, not Spencer. Henry was supposed to be getting all the kisses, and playing cars with Mom all day. It wasn't fair.

It was a Friday night, and Henry and Spencer sat at the dining room table colouring while their mother helped Jack Hotchner - who came over most Fridays - with his maths homework.

"I hate long division!" Jack said, frustrated. He set down his pencil and rested his head on his hands.

"Well you've finished them all now, and they're all right." JJ said. "How about a snack?"

Jack nodded, closing his maths book and racing off to use the bathroom while JJ went to the kitchen to set out three glasses of milk, and a plate of cookies.

Spencer crawled on to the table and picked up Jack's maths book, looking at the pictures of happy, smiling children in a classroom on the front cover. He opened the book and looked at the questions Jack had been doing, the page bookmarked by a slightly nibbled pencil. There was one answer that wasn't right. It should be 6, not 12. Spencer picked up the green marker he had been drawing with and wrote a big 6 next to Jack's 12.

Henry was just about to tell Spencer he wasn't allowed to draw on Jack's things, but he decided not too. Henry had drawn a dragon on Jack's English book once, and Mom said she would be upset if it happened again. Well, it was _going_ to happen again. Spencer was going to draw over everything and Mom was going to realize she had made a big mistake bringing Spencer home.

Spencer turned the page. There were more questions, and Jack hadn't got to them yet. Spencer thought he would help, so he started to fill them in, 18. 12. 36. 9. He only stopped when someone's hands came in and took the book from him.

"Spencer, no." JJ said, but her voice didn't convey any hint of anger. "We don't draw on books. This is Jack's book."

Spencer looked from his mother to the maths book. That's right, it _was_ Jack's book. And Jack had a Daddy who was big and would probably be very angry.

"I'm sorry Mommy." Spencer managed.

"It's alright Spencer," JJ said. "But we'll try and remember next time, okay? Why don't you boys go and watch some TV? I'll bring in the snacks."

Henry scowled at his mother. Not even a telling off!

Spencer climbed down from the chair and ran from the room. He didn't want a spank.

JJ flipped through the maths book, big green marks all the way through it. She'd have to buy Jack another one. JJ tried to decipher what Spencer had drawn. At first they looked like scribbles, nothing compared to Henry's drawings of people will the correct amount of legs and arms and eyes and noses, but as she looked closer, JJ saw the pictures weren't pictures at all, they were numbers. Answers to the questions, and they were all correct. Page after page, Spencer had filled in all the answers.

JJ went to her study and set up Henry's PC game, designed to teach kids basic maths and english skills in a fun way. She needed to see just how much Spencer knew.

She took the milk and cookies in to Jack and Henry and led Spencer into the study, lifting him up and setting him down on her lap infront of the screen.

"JJ, I so sorry." Spencer said softly. He didn't call her 'Mom'. She probably didn't even want him anymore. "I wont be naughty again."

"You haven't been bad, Spencer." JJ assured him. "I brought you in here because you knew all the answers to Jack's math questions, and I want to see what else you know."

"Mommy teached me math." Spencer said. "And weading."

JJ loaded the game and Spencer pointed to the right answers before JJ could even read him the questions. She skipped to grade 4, and Spencer had no trouble answering them all, too.

There was a knock at the door, and JJ brought Hotch inside to apologize for the book and to tell him about Spencer.

"He's clearly gifted." Hotch agreed. "I don't think anything bad can come of taking him for a few tests."

JJ took the weekend to think about it, and by Monday afternoon, she decided that while Spencer was still only a baby, as Hotch had said, a few tests couldn't hurt him. The people could tell her just how smart he was, and show her ways she could teach him that would help him learn even more. JJ sat in the dining room, pencilling dates into her planner when a knock at the door and a voice calling, "Henry!" sent her eldest running for the door, and her youngest running straight for her.

"Sweetheart, it's only Will." JJ assured Spencer. Regardless, he buried his head in his mother's side and stayed there until she picked him up.

Spencer liked Will and Uncle Derek, and he liked Uncle Aaron too, but they were Henry's family, not his. They should get to have special time together like when his real mom used to read to him. He would never have a real mommy or daddy or uncle ever again, and that made Spencer sad.

"Spence, would you like to play with Will and Henry?" JJ tried. The boy shook his head. "Okay."

JJ held Spencer against her and waved to Will, who sent her a sympathetic look before beginning to set up the Nintendo Wii with Henry. She told Spencer about the tests he would be having on Thursday.

"Will it hurt?" Spencer asked.

"Of course not baby, it's going to be just like that computer game. And I'll be there with you."

Spencer nodded. He looked towards Henry and Will. Henry was waving the controller around, and he seemed happy he was winning the game. Couldn't he see Will was _letting_ him win?

A little while later, Will took Henry to the park, so Spencer could relax. JJ took the boy to the kitchen and set him down on the bench.

"How about we make a big chocolate cake for after dinner?" She asked, knowing Spencer could _not _refuse.

As JJ read through the recipe book, Spencer started thinking about his dad. He knew he he had one, because while he didn't know exactly how it worked, he knew there needed to be a mommy and a daddy to have a baby.

"Mommy?" Spencer asked, confused. "Is Will my daddy too?"

"No, Spencer, he's not."

"Is my daddy coming to play with me?"

"No, but mommy with play with you."

Spencer dismissed JJ's last comment and kicked his feet against the cabnets.

"Will daddy come when I get bigger?" He asked, "Or will he come when it's July?"

"Spence, he's not going to come over." JJ pushed.

"Oh." Spencer said."Did he die, like my firstest mommy?"

"No, he didn't."

"Oh. Does he have to go to work?"

"Um, well, yes, but -"

"Maybe on a Saturday we can go to the Zoo."

JJ knew how jealous Spencer had been when Will took Henry to the Zoo the previous week, she didn't think Spencer had ever been.

"Look, Spence -"

"Is my daddy's name Brian? Or is it John? Does he work at the work you work?"

Spencer began to bombard JJ with questions that she didn't know how to answer. She couldn't distract him with shiny things, candy, or by simply changing the subject like she could with Henry. He was far too precocious. Besides, maybe it was time he knew.

"Spencer, " She said seriously. "Your daddy isn't coming. Not ever."

"Uh-huh." Spencer said, nodding. She could see the disappointment. "Oh."

"Sometimes, even though a daddy really loves his boy, he can't look after him."

"We could give the mail carrier some money to take to my daddy. Then he could ride the bus."

"But," JJ said, ignoring Spencer. "The daddy gives his son to someone who he knows will love him, and take good care of him."

Spencer took a moment.

"That's you!" He said, tapping JJ and starting to play with her hair.

"Yeah, that's me."

There was a long pause, JJ went to the cupboard for the flour and eggs, Spencer continued looked through the recipe book.

"If my firstest mommy didn't die, you would have one boy." He said matter-of-factly, holding up one finger. He giggled, then gave JJ a big smile. She didn't return it.

* * *

_Next : Spencer turns three._

_Please review :)_


	5. Chapter 5

_Hi guys! Sorry for the wait, I just finished final exams and then I went on (an unplanned) holiday for a two weeks. I will try and update more regularly from now on. Hope you enjoy the new chapter!_

* * *

Spencer turned three on October 13th.

"I don't want a present." He told JJ the night before. "No present."

He didn't seem excited for his birthday at all. His reaction was so very different from Henry, who had requested everything from the toy store and wanted a party at McDonald's with everyone from kindergarten.

JJ asked the obvious. "Why don't you want a present?"

Spencer huffed and laid down in his bed.

"Because no present!" He promptly rolled over and faced the wall. "I'm sleeping now, you go away."

The next morning, Spencer woke up early and went into the kitchen. He figured that now he was three, he could make himself some breakfast. The boy pulled out all the drawers and used them to climb up on to the counter. He opened the bag of bread and carefully put two slices into the toaster. He usually only had one, but he supposed that now he was three he needed more food than before.

When the toast popped up, Spencer carefully buttered both pieces with a blunt knife - he knew he wasn't yet big enough to touch the sharp ones - then made his way towards the table. He stopped halfway between the kitchen and the dining room when a bright red box with a green ribbon came into view. It sat on the floor under the table, and was roughly four times his size. A present. And it must be for him, because it wasn't anyone else's birthday. Spencer threw the toast against the wall and started the cry. He ran back to his bedroom and slammed the door.

Spencer was back in bed and hiding under the blankets when JJ found him. She had woken up to Henry eating cereal and watching TV, and toast sitting on the carpet next to a broken plate, but no Spencer.

"I asked you no present." Spencer said. He felt the bed dip when his mother sat down, but he wasn't going to crawl out and look at her.

"I know you did, but you're my son and I wanted you to have something nice for your birthday."

JJ heard Spencer growl. "It's about respect!" He yelled, and JJ tried so hard not to laugh. When Spencer stuck his head out to tell her not to make fun of him, she saw he was really upset about it, and then she felt bad.

"Spencer, why didn't you want a present?" JJ tried. "Can you make me understand?"

Spencer wondered if he should tell his mom. He wondered if there was anything to tell. His memory was fuzzy, he was confused, and his first-Mom had specifically told him to keep it a secret or 'they' might come and take him away. But this Mom wouldn't let that happen, would she?

"Because first Mommy said don't let him give me toys." Spencer said softly. "Said he mean when he gives toys. He was mean to me."

JJ saw a flash of Spencer, the day they had found him, laying on the floor crying and covered in scars. Surely he couldn't remember how he had gotten them?

"Can you tell me what he did to you?"

"Bad stuffs. I don't know. Mommy said. Try and make me do stuffs with a present."

"Who did the bad things to you?"

"Uncle Danny."

* * *

Spencer and Henry played with their toy cars on the carpet, and the present sat unopened under the table. JJ stood in the kitchen on the phone to Garcia, who was searching her computer for a 'Daniel Reid.'

"Found him!"

It hadn't taken long. Like many paedophiles, Daniel hadn't been convicted and wasn't on any criminal database. He appeared to live an ordinary life, working a low-end office job. Or he had been. Daniel had died about a week before Diana had, never having been brought to justice.

"That could have contributed to Diana's overdose." JJ told Garcia. "We know she wasn't stable, she would have mourned her brother even if he was pure evil."

"She knew?" Garcia said sadly. "She didn't try to help Spencer?"

"Spencer told me she warned him against Daniel." JJ explained. "She was probably scared he would have someone come and take him from her. She didn't see any other option."

* * *

Three days later, the present still sat unopened and Spencer refused to acknowledge it. JJ felt like she hadn't done anything to celebrate her youngest son turning three, so she called Will and organized for him to have Henry while she took Spencer to the Zoo.

That morning, Spencer sat on the kitchen bench while JJ did up his shoelaces. Garcia had brought him tiny black Chuck Taylor's that had soon become his favourite shoes, and he was wearing them over a plain purple sock, and fittingly, a black sock with a picture of a tiger.

"Have you been to the Zoo before?" JJ asked.

The boy shook his head. His first-mom didn't like to take him out of the house. She would usually make him stay in the closet while she went out for groceries, and it was only very, very occasionally that she took him to the library.

"I seen tigers in my books." He said eagerly. "And I seen monkeys."

"The monkeys are my favourite." JJ said. "Which animal do you like best?"

Spencer thought for a moment. He couldn't choose any he hadn't actually _met_. Dogs always barked at him, and cats had claws.

"I like mouses." He said. "I seen a mouse in my bedroom." He held his hands an inch apart. "It was this small!"

JJ didn't dwell on the fact her son had been raised in a house riddled with vermin. "There's a petting zoo where we're going so you might get to see some mice."

Spencer grinned and kicked his legs in excitement. JJ helped him down on to the floor and raced him to the car.

* * *

It was a Wednesday, and the zoo was almost empty. Without teenagers throwing rocks and poking sticks through cages, and the general noisiness that came with weekend crowds, the animals were quite content to laze about in the open, rather than retreating into their hide-aways.

JJ held Spencer and they watched the spider monkeys swing around in their enclosure. One was swinging on a tight-rope by its tail, and another was staring at its reflection in the murky water that ran through. Spencer pointed upwards and JJ saw there were three sleeping on top of each other on a platform.

"Spider monkeys my favourite." Spencer declared. So much more fun to watch that mice.

The pair moved through the zoo, watching giraffes and zebras walk around their enclosures, sea lions swim past through a glass wall, and elephants suck water up through their trunks and spray their keepers. Spencer hadn't liked the tigers at all, he had heard one roar and watched another tear apart a cut of meat, and had wanted to leave immediately. They were too close for comfort, and he was under the impression that if it wanted to, a tiger could break apart it's enclosure and come after him.

"Mommy, no.." He had whined. "Go to the mice."

It was right on 1pm when Spencer said he needed to go to the bathroom, and JJ had to try and work out the map in the visitors pamphlet while Spencer pulled on her pant leg and did a little dance. Lucky for them, they were a two minute walk from the rest station, and after she had helped Spencer, JJ decided it was time for lunch.

JJ lifted Spencer up and he read through the menu stuck to the side of the canteen. His mom had told him he could have whatever he wanted, but he didn't want her wasting too much money buying food for him. His first-mom never took him out to eat because she said it was far too expensive. Besides, he hadn't tried many of the things on the menu and he didn't want mom throwing away food because he didn't like the taste.

"Mommy what are you buying?" Spencer asked.

"I'm going to get a sandwich. What about you?"

A sandwich didn't look as good as the pictures of chicken nuggets or burgers, but Spencer would have that too.

"How about we get some fries to share too?"

Spencer nodded earnestly.

* * *

Following lunch, JJ let Spencer play on the playground for a bit. Henry would run around pretending he was a plane or a pirate, find another kid to play Cops and Robbers with, or try to climb up the slide from the wrong end. Spencer on the other hand, crawled under the jungle gym and sat in silence while he spun the brightly colored balls attached to the side of the structure. She wondered if he would be happier doing something else, he was a smart kid and perhaps he was too advanced for childish play? JJ asked him why he didn't go and play with the other kids running around the oversized dinosaur egg sculpture, and pretend to be a dinosaur too. Spencer had only shaken his head. "But I'm not a dinosaur." He said, confused. JJ returned to the bench and watched on.

A little while later, JJ felt someone tap her shoulder. She turned to see the man from the cafeteria standing over her with a receipt.

"I'm sorry, ma'am." He said, "Your payment didn't go through, incorrect PIN?"

"Oh, I'll try it again..." JJ turned to see Spencer. He was still sitting under the jungle gym spinning the balls. She would only be gone a second. She followed the man to the checkout, paid for the meals and went back to the bench, alarmed to find Spencer had moved. He was nowhere in sight.

* * *

Spencer ran into a wall. Or rather, what had seemed like a wall and had turned out to be a man's legs.

"Hey there, little guy." He had said. "Are you lost?"

Spencer had been quite content playing with the colorful plastic balls and counting off numbers in his head, until he had looked up and found that his mother was gone. He had only been with this mom for a little while, but he had already made her leave. Maybe if he found her before she left the park, he could convince her to stay? He didn't want to be left behind again, especially in a place where he could be eaten. So he had found himself running past the tiger's enclosure, past the trees with the monkeys and past the zebras, right into the man's legs. He didn't like men. And he didn't like _this_ man. He stumbled and fell on to his backside. He scrambled to get up and felt the man's hands all over his body. He pushed them away and tried to cry out but the sound was stuck. He kicked his legs until he felt the man let go, then he got to his feet and ran in the opposite direction, as fast as he could.

The boy reached the front entrance. "Mama..." He sobbed. She wasn't anywhere to be seen. She really had left him. Just like his first mom, his dad, his uncle Danny, his foster mothers. Spencer sat down on the ground and sobbed. It must have been the sandwich. Or maybe he spent too long on the playground. No, she never wanted him from the start.

While he cried, Spencer thought about where he was going to go now. Maybe he could live with the animals like Tarzan or Mowgli? He did like the monkeys, and surely that would be better than going to another foster home. Spencer was drawn out of his thoughts when he felt someone tap his shoulder, and looked up to see a teenager girl in a green polo-shirt and khaki pants kneeling in front of him. He read the word "STAFF" embroidered on to her shirt, but he didn't know if he could trust her.

"Have you lost mommy or daddy?" She asked. "I can help you find them."

Spencer shook his head. "I don't have a daddy." He said.

"Did you come with your mommy?"

Spencer nodded. He stopped crying long enough to get out, "Bring mommy back" before starting up again. He took the girl's outstretched hand and let her lead him into the ticket booth.

"What's your name?" The girl asked.

"Spencer."

"And do you know your mommy's name?"

"JJ."

Spencer heard the girl calling his mom over the loud-speaker. She lifted him on to her lap and they sat at the ticket booth watching over the park and waiting. He had been offered a lollipop and a balloon, but he didn't want either. He wanted his mom back.

It seemed like hours, and Spencer had been crying so long he felt like he was going to be sick, but JJ eventually came into view. She was jogging towards the window, waving and crying too. Spencer pushed himself of the girl's lap and fell to the floor, running outside and right into his mom's arms.

"MAMA YOU LEFT!" He screamed.

JJ picked Spencer up and hugged him tight, frantically trying to calm him. She felt him pulling on her shirt with tight little fists while he pushed his head into her shoulder.

"MOMMY!"

Spencer had abandonment issues, that much was clear. He had lived with her for a few months and she would like to think his initial worries had been forgotten, but he still cried and clung to her at night when she tried to get him to stay in his own bed. She couldn't leave him with a baby-sitter because he would get severely distressed, and she hadn't even _attempted_ to go back to work because she knew Spencer wouldn't cope without her. She never stopped worrying about him, especially now he was due to start kindergarten. Given what she knew, she couldn't believe she had been so stupid to run of and leave him alone in a strange place.

"I'm so sorry, Spence." She said, she was trying to stop herself from crying because she knew it was only upsetting him further. "Mommy had to go back to the cafeteria, but I should have told you where I was going."

"Mommy please don't go." Spencer sobbed. "I want to stay here."

JJ carried Spencer to a bench, sat him down and kneeled in front of him.

"I'm not going anywhere." She said promised. "Mommy loves you too much_." _She took a bottle of water out of her bag and helped Spencer drink some. She supposed she should go and thank the girl who found Spencer... but she was nowhere in sight.

"What if you die." Spencer said softly. "You could love me, but you could die."

JJ thought back to the conversation she had with him about his real mother. He was far too intelligent to be distracted from his question with ice-cream like Henry would be. She needed to choose her words carefully.

"Well, I could." She said. "But what are the chances of a little boy loosing two moms? What is the probability?" She knew Spencer had read all about probability in Jack's math book.

"Very unlikely." He said.

"Very, very unlikely. Exceedingly unlikely." JJ pushed. "I would say there's a higher probability of being eaten by a spider monkey."

Spencer giggled and looked up at his mom.

"Or turning in to a tiger!" He held his hands like claws and looked roared.

JJ pretended to be scared, Spencer laughed and swung his legs.

"Spencer, if I buy you something, it's not because I want anything back."

Spencer sighed. "I know that." He said very quietly. "It's a bicycle, isn't it?"

"You're too smart!" JJ exclaimed. "How did you know that?"

"Because what else would be that big?"

"A pet mouse." JJ said flatly, Spencer was confused for a second before he realized she was joking and then he giggled.

"We have to see the mice!" He screeched, jumping up and pulling on his mother's hand. "Come on!"

JJ let Spencer drag her over to the giant map of the park and held him up while he decided where he wanted to go. He was smiling, he was happy, but she was still so worried about him. Adopting a child she knew little about had opened her up for uncertainty, she could only hope that time would ease Spencer's fears.

* * *

_Hope that was okay. Once again, sorry for the delay!_  
_Please leave a review if you're reading they really make my day and give me the motivation to continue._  
_Next chapter: Spencer starts preschool, JJ has to go back to work._


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